The Scandalicious 2011 American Music Awards

Dear Readers,

I don’t usually watch award shows anymore, they bore me, they are too long, I often don’t know the people who win, or at least wish I didn’t. They are n’t as as funny or as entertaining as they used to be in the nineties, or maybe I’m just getting older (but honestly who watches the Oscars anymore, Now the ’98 Oscars when Titanic won a then record breaking number of awards, and Celine Dion sang My Heart Will Go On– now that was a show to watch!)

Award shows nowadays only provide unintentionally amusement or ridicule, such as that cringe worthy moment when Beyonce announced she was pregnant  at  the VMA. Her hair was blowing in the wind, like a Bollywood star, she unbuttoned her jacket and exaggeratedly rubbed her tummy, the audience squealed in delight, the camera panned to Jay-Z-I almost puked. It was something out of bad day-time T.V. It felt like a spoof of someone announcing they are pregnant-it was OTT. They have started selling their child even before it iss born! Don’t even get me started on the ‘is she pregnant or isn’t she’ story.

I’m rambling off-topic again-sorry. The AMAs decided to up the ante, and create such a scandal, in the form of J-Lo’s perfomance that it overshadowed most of the show-most other things actually.

And the designer gown thief suctioned off her gown

J-Lo started of modestly enough, in a long gown singing some ballad, then she paused, gave a naughty look at the camera and her clothes were whisked away to reveal a bling slinky revealing number which was cut very low, and the bottom bit sort hung between her legs and like glittery tail. I thought this was racy enough. While she danced in and out of a Fiat- the company who sponsors her. Now some stars were outraged at the commericalisation of the song, I really couldn’t care less. It is marketing people- ever heard of product placement? By the way its a great example -I’m even going to use it in my class. I’m sure my students will remember this 🙂

I thought this was racy enough, and I thought as teens these days watch similar music videos it was alright, although I cringed everytime her glittery tail thing sorta swung away from her.

Suddenly, the dress-I use the term loosely here, came off! There stood J-Lo in a nude coloured body suit, her bits embellished with glitter-I gasped. The music for On the Floor started playing and she started dancing provocativley not the usual mix of aerobics, gymnastics that passes for modern dance. More like strip tease.
When I was thinking it couldn’t get worse, she runs over to Pitbull,(and I’d naively thought he’d just stand there far away and sing). No, J-Lo has other things in mind- she starts grinding agaisnt him, and the dance was just inappropriate full stop.

At 42, she looks good enough to pull it off, but just because you can do something, it doesn’t mean you have to do it, or that it is in good taste. Everyone must’ve been thinking what was going through her ex-husband, Marc Anthony’s head, when he sang the duet with Pitbull shortly after. Maybe that’s why she did it- she had an agenda against Marc Anthony- and maabe her other exes too! Who knows?

Marc Anthony thinking I’d like to rain something on you @$$’

It seems that modestly standards keep on getting lower-and women are not getting more empowered by stripping- goes to show how enslaved to male desires they really are!

Christina Aguilera was another one insisting on flaunting her ample flesh, by wearing a dress at least a size or two, too small. Her cleavage awas at display, the girls were squeezed tight, and her belly looked bloated. I was surprised she could sing at all. Her make-up was almost edging into drag queen territory. What happened- will she go down the road well-trodden by Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan and others- is this is a start of a downward spiral? Celebrities who are paid to look good, have all that money and experts at their disposal;they really don’t have any excuse to look that bad; unless they have bad taste and/or their stylists have bad taste. When in doubt take a look at the tweets mentioning you Christina, yes-its time to find a new stylist.

Enough celebrity bashing for today. Now I’m going to mention the two performances that I actually liked: Enrique Iglesias’ I like the way it feels and Tonight- the clean version, sung with a choir in the background. I thought it was sweet, but then I’m biased.

Secondly, I like Katy Perry’s You’re a Firework performance. She looked amazing in that red gown, with gloves, the thigh high slit, added to the hotness factor. I thought they could’ve done something better with her hair, but atleast it wasnt pink, and she still looked amazing; she brought back glamour and style to the AMA.

I guess I’ll have to mention that adolescent boy-toy mania that has spread like a malady across the female teenage population of the world- Justin Bieber who performed under the mistle toe.

Bieber fans I have saved the best* for last ;-).

Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber

C’mon people don’t be shy, please tell me what you thought of the show, you don’t have to agree with what I say y’know :-)!
Who were your favourite acts, who was a fail?